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A non-Christmas story: Strigberger

By Marcel Strigberger

An elementary school principal in Omaha, Nebraska was put on administrative leave for banning candy canes in her school. This, of course, she did in the name of inclusion, as to her Xmas celebrations might be offensive to some students. As the Mad Hatter in Alice in Wonderland might say, Merry un-Christmas.

Actually, the ban also included Christmas-related imagery such as reindeer, trees and even Santa himself. Her reason for including the candy cane was the J shape of the candy, which J, of course, stands for Jesus. She was so convinced of her theological theory that she claimed that even the colours are offensive to non-believers, to wit, red stands for the blood of Christ and white for his redemption. From the looks of it, she elevated the candy cane as a religious item, rivaling the host wafer, the chalice and the crucifix. No doubt, the candy cane is a staple item in the pockets of any self-respecting priest.

I guess in her mind it never occurred to her that just maybe the offending piece of candy is actually called candy cane because it is shaped like a cane.

In this case, authorities did not put up with any nonsense. They did not can (cane?) her; they put her on admin leave. You just don’t do these things in Omaha, Nebraska. Hey Toto, I don’t think we’re in Berkeley.

I can only imagine what this woman would have to say about the iconic song, “White Christmas," composed by Irving Berlin. Dreaming of a white Christmas? No way, Jose. Firstly, it is offensive in that it excludes kids in hot climates such as Florida. They may dream as much as they want but it ain’t going to happen in Fort Myers.

Expose children to this song and you’ve scarred them irreparably for life.

Then let us not forget Irving Berlin was Jewish. Cultural appropriation. Berlin had no business composing that song. No go. Call him out.

And as for the colour white? Are you kidding? I’m not going near that one. Jesus!

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