Six tips to overcome the legal bully in your divorce
Legal bullies come in a variety of forms. The most popular ones take advantage of the legal system, try to control/intimidate you by using the system against you, exhausting your legal funds, use your children against you, contradict everything (even when it’s not important!), make you feel like you are not entitled to certain relief or just intimidate you from doing anything bold.
1. It’s not forever — Know that your bully is the reason why you are here in the first place. Remember that sooner or later, you will be free of he/she and can put it all behind you. So, give it your all and do not be scared.
2. You are entitled — Whether it is spousal support, equalization, the gardening tools or even the treadmill in the matrimonial home! If you are entitled to it, then do not quit. You’ll regret walking away later on.
3. Know when to back down — Sometimes, the legal bully just wants a fight. Do you? It’s not always about what is fair or not but it’s about compromise and sometimes ignoring it. It’s not worth playing their dirty tricks or their moves if it won’t benefit you down the line. You need to pick and choose your battle.
4. Have a support system — Family, friends, co-workers. Anyone you can talk to freely and who is guiding you correctly. Do not listen to the ones who are encouraging the high conflict. It’s not worth it.
5. Get a lawyer — If you are doing this by yourself, it will be easy for the legal bully to take advantage of you. Get a strong family law lawyer to protect your interests and peace of mind.
6. Know where they are coming from — A legal bully has some sort of unresolved issues. They are insecure, scared and sometimes angry that you chose to respect yourself. By trying to regain control of you somehow, they get pleasure out of it. Why should they?